Friday, September 9, 2011

I'm a Lunatic. For Sure.

So many thoughts swirling around my head.

The good news is that my Dad came home from the hospital this morning.  I would feel even better about it if the doctors had had something definitive to say about why he ended up there in the first place, but I'll take what I can get.  After all kinds of tests and blood work, they couldn't find anything that looked out of whack.  He got bag after bag of fluids while he was there though and that definitely seemed to help.  I guess the cumulative effect of all of the chemo drugs took a toll, but he is on the mend.  Whew.  That is a tremendous relief.

And then there's the fact that we have THREE MORE DAYS.  I'm counting Monday because when my wife called to coordinate the test with her OB office they told her they would call with the results on Tuesday.  TUESDAY?!!!!  They agreed to put a rush on it for more $$ (grumble, grumble), but I'm still thinking it might be close of business Monday.  The details don't really matter actually.  This wait feels endless.

But by far the weirdest thing going on around here is the fact that I am entirely preoccupied with something that I've only given the briefest thought to before.


I have twins on the brain.  It must be because of the fact that we transferred an almost unthinkable three embryos.  I never thought about twins in any serious way during the wait after the transfer we did with two embryos.  The only thinking I've ever done about twins was in the very early days when we were moving towards IVF and having conversations about risks and being conservative and doing what we could to avoid it.  Not because having two babies at the same time sounded like a terrible thing (overwhelming, yes.  terrible, no) but because it sounded like a medically risky thing.

Now I feel a little differently.  My wife had such a strong and healthy pregnancy with Yogi and although the birth experience wasn't what we had hoped for (damn C section), I'm not as nervous as I used to be.  This is probably overconfidence, but it's where I am.  Yup.  Where I am is right smack dab in the middle of "Hoping for Twins" land.  Am I a lunatic or what?  At least I realize I'm a lunatic.  I do have that going for me.



Well, you might be a lunatic but at least you're not alone. I would love to have twins! ...and my wife thinks I'm nutso. Eh. I'll keep my fingers crossed for your BFP!

speaking as someone who has twins i will say it is fun. and absolutely crazy at the same time. i would not trade it for the world. hoping for a bfp for your family!

Twins would be awesome! And the medical risks seem minimal since your family had a very healthy pregnancy experience the first time (despite Yogi being breech). Plus, your wife is obviously in great shape for pregnancy. I bet she would show a lot earlier with multiples! We're pulling for you guys!

BTW: you *are* a lunatic, fo sho! But you're also an amazing mama!!!

I'm SO happy to read this because these have been my thoughts every time I've excitedly wondered what's happening up in there:

Oh, I hope they are pregnant with TWINS! Wait, what's wrong with you; you don't even know if that's what they want, you can't pull for that! Aw, man, but it would be awesome! No! Just focus on praying for one super healthy baby! One baby! Focus on that!

So now you've given me permission to pray for one OR two without so much guilt. :)

Honestly, tomorrow night feels like a century from now! (I'm relieved, though, that this period of waiting is a bit less marked now with worry for your dad.)

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